After that unfaithful night slash adultery holiday in Bandung, I tried swimming back to the dating pool. It's not that I missed the feeling of being fucked or anything, it's just that I started to believe that it is healthy, at least for my mental health. I redownload growler and tinder in which those two apps gave me a hell of a ride. mind you that I'm not exactly an ugly person, I still have my charms, but the trouble with dealing with someone else, my boss used to refer as "do not put your happiness in someone else's hand" is like a mantra to me, I took seriously on the word "hand" - my own hand.
Now, the dating pool is not necessarily kind to me, tried to date this gorgeous guy whom I met in tinder but he stood me up telling me he has no ride, he lives in pamulang then telling me he lives in mampang. Like seriously in Jakarta how on earth can you tell someone that you don't have a ride while gojek and grap are swarming the whole city like flies. I believe I'm living a good life, I paid my tax, and living a minimum enemy per building. did I have bad karma or something, why is it so hard to find a good guy?
Though I still live in a state where I uphold a single life is an ultimate life, but still, a girl wants some tlc once in a while.
five years ago, I still have that fantasy where every time I met someone whom I think is a catch I instantly thinking about living a life together, where sleeping together were meant to be done by a couple only. well look at me now trying to hook up to two different guys and booking a hotel where we can shag. I still haven't done it yet, by the time I wrote this.
The question is, am I really ready? ready to have fun without having those emotional baggages.
No comments